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I'm not normally a fan of the public school system. There are far too many constraints on the teachers and it seems like the only goal is to teach test taking skills. So, I was pleasantly surprised when the principal went beyond what I had come to expect of the system.

Yesterday my son was in the Principal's office. Apparently a little girl who has been harassing Hunter all year finally pushed him over the edge. She's bit him, kicked him, hit him...the list goes on. But, Hunter knows better than to put his hands on a female. Instead, he used his words-and very colorful ones at that.

So, I got a phone call. It wasn't the phone call I would have expected from a principal in such a situation. While he and I were both upset about the words Hunter used, the main concern that he voiced was that Hunter didn't go to an adult. He was also impressed that Hunter didn't make excuses or try to get out of the consequences. He admitted what he did and expressed regret and frustration about not knowing what else to do.

See, Hunter has gone to adults in these situations and the result backfired. He got bullied worse because the adult in question didn't handle it well. This principal explained his method of dealing with such situations and it didn't involve my son being treated worse for going to an adult. In short, he exceeded my expectations and I was pleasantly surprised. Hunter has consequences that he should have and he now knows where to go in similar situations.

20 comments:

  1. We all have our breaking points. Nobody should have to put up with abuse. I think Hunter just couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry your son has had to endure that kind of abuse, but I'm glad the principal responded in an appropriate manner.

  1. My daughter, who is in 4th grade, has had to deal with quite a few bullies during her time at school. Some of the adults handle the situations, still others tended to make matters worse. I am glad your son has a principal who knows what he is doing!!

    Kathy
    http://www.thetruckerswife.com/

  1. WOW momma must be proud : )

  1. I am so glad your principal knew how to handle the situation correctly.

    My older son, (a high schooler), was being picked on and teased because when he was talking to some "friends" before class, the flag fell off the wall above him and fell on his head. As a result, he was called a "commie" and a "traitor". My son was pissed that the teacher didn't do or say anything about it. He brought it to me and I wrote the teacher a note and neary a phone call or an email or a note did I get back. However, my son said all was forgotten.

    Then a few weeks later two boys started up again with him on Facebook. Those same names were hurled and they did not let up. My husband, who closely monitors his account, printed it off, drove him to school and told the principal this bullying and the threats were going to stop. The principal handled it extremely well. The boys have since apologized...and the principal has my son check in once a week with him to make sure things are going well. This pleasantly went beyond our expectations of the principal.

    You've posted a great blog...thanks for sharing. Sorry, I tend to give long responses!

  1. One of the things that worries me most is the fact that parents seem to be okay with their kids being bullies.
    Thanks for all the support and please never apologize for lengthy comments. I love to read them!

  1. Sounds like Hunter did the best he could in a bad situation. A few cuss words are better than fists. It's so hard to deal with bullying. As soon as a child goes to an adult, the bullying gets worse because the child is seen to have 'snitched'. Nice to see a teacher exceeding expectations, for once.

  1. That's great! It's not always easy to know how to handle situations that you find yourself in especially when you feel mistreated! Sounds like Hunter is learning a great deal and that the principle is doing a good job of supporting him!

  1. Hunter sounds like a very smart kid.

  1. Hunter handled himself a lot better than many adults do when they are pushed to their limits. Good job, Hunter!

    We had to deal with a group of bullying girls when my kids were in school and I found out pretty quickly that their parents pretty much thought that their daughters' behavior was a normal part of being a kid, so they refused to speak to them about it. When asked again after the activity continued, they turned really nasty, making my husband and I realize that the bullying behaviors the girls displayed had been learned right in their own homes. Ridiculous.

  1. When I see a kid who is that badly behaved, I know that the parents have alot to do with it. To me, there is no such thing as a "bad kid", just poor parenting.

  1. Good for Hunter, the word (pen) is mightier than the sword. I'm glad the Principal exceeded your expectations.

  1. Great write, Bullies are cowards and need to be addressed.

  1. Having an effective principal to handle situations like that makes all the difference. Hunter seems to be a stand up guy. Good jog, Hunter! (Maybe this girl will change schools or something...)

    I have had to deal with similar situations. We have to be an advocate and voice for our kids!

  1. I'm glad the principal intervened. Now he will also be aware to look out for those pestering your son, too.

  1. Good for Hunter for sticking up for himself in a nonphysical way! I've been there before when I was in school...

  1. Hunter is the soul of restraint in my mind. I would have smacked her at the first nasty. And I am an adult, maybe?
    Nice post.

    Pam
    A Pirate Looks Past Sixty

  1. You have won the Versatile Blogger Award, from Beth to me to you. Pick it up and pay it forward:
    http://apiratelookspastsixty.blogspot.com/2011/05/versatile-blogger-seriously.html

  1. Woot! Awesome, thanks!

  1. My son was the same way. Now he's almost 15, and I am homeschooling him. I don't know if I'm doing the right thing, but it's the right thing for now.

  1. Here's to the principal exceeding expectations! Hope the experience at the school turns out to be better than expected for both Mama and Hunter!

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